What is a “midlife crisis?” Does everyone have one?
In this video, I’ll answer those questions and give you my top 3 mindset hacks to keep you going strong through a midlife crisis.
My definition of midlife crisis is a feeling of disillusionment that although you’ve done what you thought would lead to being happy and successful, you still feel unfulfilled.
It’s usually accompanied by a wake-up call or a sudden awareness of your own mortality, because you realize you’ve already lived half your life.
This may lead you to question who you are or what you’re doing with your life.
Maybe you got caught up in the belief that “I’ll be happy when (blank) happens – I graduate college, get a job, get a new car, get in shape, have a good relationship, get married, buy a house, have kids,” and so on.
Unfortunately, what you may find is that once you have all the things you strived for, you still feel like something important is missing, even though you’re not even sure what that is.
After all, you “checked all the boxes” or done everything you thought (or were told) you needed to do, to be fulfilled in life.
If that’s you, maybe you need a sense of meaning or purpose in your life.
Or maybe you need more passion and the feeling of being lit up by what you’re doing.
Or maybe you spent so long taking care of others that you need to slow down and take time to focus on yourself and what you really need.
You may also lack confidence or be unsure of your identity if you’re having a midlife crisis.
Back to our question of “does everyone have a midlife crisis?”
I believe that answer is no, not everyone has one, but the lucky ones do!
If you’re looking back on how you spent the first several decades of your life. and you know you’ll regret it if you spend your remaining decades the same way, that’s a gift because it’s an opportunity to make the changes you need to.
So many people aren’t lucky enough to have this realization in midlife, and it isn’t until they’re on their deathbed that they realize they didn’t focus on what they truly wanted in their life.
In the book “The Top Five Regrets of the Dying.” the author wrote that the most common regret her terminal patients had was this:
“I wish I had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me.”
I don’t know about you, but that hits me hard.
If you want to avoid that regret by taking advantage of what your midlife crisis is telling you, here are my top 3 mindset hacks to keep you going strong through it.
#1 – Midlife is NOT too late to make changes.
Sometimes you can convince yourself that it’s too late to go after your dreams in midlife, but that couldn’t be further from the truth.
If you were able to ask any of those people with the deathbed regret we talked about, I bet they’d tell you that unless you’re in their position, it’s never too late to create the life you want, especially during midlife.
Practice shifting your mindset and telling yourself the same thing.
#2 – Let go of the need for approval. Tell yourself that the only approval you need is your own.
This can be a hard shift to make, especially if you were rewarded for things like getting good grades in school, and you learned to derive your value and worth from meeting the standards of others.
You might have gotten to where you are now by doing what others or society said you should do to be considered “successful.”
But when you realize they actually didn’t know what’s best for you, you can begin looking inside yourself to find what really is.
#3 – No time has been wasted!
It can be easy to fall into the trap of thinking “I’ve wasted so much time!” But all that thought will do is bring you down and discourage you from taking action.
Plus, it’s not even accurate, because if that time was spent bringing you to where you are now, where you’re considering those big-picture questions of who you are and what you’re doing with your life, then that time wasn’t wasted at all.
In fact, all of your past experience brought you to this point where you are now positioned for the biggest growth and expansion of your entire life.
And that my friend, is a powerful place to be!
Because in reality, a midlife crisis is not a breakDOWN, it’s a breakTHROUGH!
I hope you found this helpful. What was your biggest takeaway? Let me know in the comments.
Thanks and I look forward to seeing you next time!
Hi, I’m Bekah! I’m a Transformational Life Coach, Founder of Irie Life Coaching, and Creator of the Reinvent My Reality Program. I help people who are unfulfilled overcome deeply subconscious self-limiting beliefs, negative thought patterns, and unreasonable fears and doubts, so they can reignite their passions and begin living an authentic life filled with meaning and purpose.
My mission is to help others consciously create the life they desire, instead of living on autopilot, settling by default, or living a life decided by outside expectations.
Want to know my top life-changing hacks? Download the free Bring Your Passions to Life Challenge to rediscover what brings you joy and makes you feel passionate, which is vital for finding the purpose that will allow you to feel fulfilled.